I have been trying to break out of the world of work for as long as I can remember. It has been an overarching theme of my life. Elsewhere in the culture, there has been a return to Stay At Home Mothering (Hat tip to Penelope Trunk), a re-upping of women to the idea of domestic engineering. That really hasn't been my thing as I mostly did not have the Mom gene. I just hate going somewhere each day.
It seemed to me if I could just hone in on the right skill set, or enhance the ones I have naturally, I'd have been able to be self-sufficient and happily ensconced in home a long, long time ago. But no body gets health care if they stay home. Not without a lot of money. With my bronchitis and asthma, I needed work...at least until after 50. Now that I'm there, I have this continuous record (er CD? Spotify tune?) playing in my head..."Do your own thing. Be who you were supposed to be."
But was who I was supposed to be ...a poor elderly woman?
Sometimes I believe that if I mastered the things that vex me my new "able-ness" would be tantamount to a lifetime scholarship that would allow me do what I love...write, read, learn stuff I want to learn, etc.
Here's the truth: If you want that life, make it happen, even in a tired, broke-down 50 + body.
Period.
Thank God nobody but me reads this crap.
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